couple's therapy




J  e n  n  i  f  e  r   M  u  r  d  o  c  c  a,   MA, MFT #45017

​Licensed Pasadena Psychotherapist - ​Los Angeles



''Mindfulness in a relationship is a path with heart because it requires our attention to one another without judgement, control, expectation, and all the other heartless invasions of ego.'

​                                                                                                       - David Richo

                                                                                            


PLEASE NOTE:

 

I AM CURRENTLY UNABLE TO ACCEPT NEW COUPLES AT THIS TIME.  MY APOLOGIES FOR ANY INCONVENIENCE.

 

 

_____________________________________________________________ 

 


​​It is a great joy & privilege for me to help couples

rebuild

the bridge of connectedness          

​

 

I focus on balancing both:

 

An exploration of the underlying issues / communication patterns that are interrupting healthy connectedness with

Concrete tools for improvement by lassoing the power of the present moment

 
 

 I help

 

  • Married couples / Life partners (from newlyweds of all ages to couples who've spent decades together)

  • Engaged couples seeking premarital counseling

  • All manner of unmarried couples with various relationship issues ranging from mild to high crisis

  • Couples dealing with the transition of welcoming a new baby into their dynamic ​​​(either while still pregnant and/or postpartum)​ 

  • Heterosexual and Gay Couples

​

​

When working with couples, I draw from the research / approaches of:   

        Psychodynamic Therapy 
        Attachment Theory & Research 
        Mindfulness Practices

        Somatic Psychology
        EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy)

        IFS (Internal Family Systems Therapy)
        Imago Therapy
        Gestalt Therapy

        John Gottman's Research




​​With an accepting,  compassionate approach that also respectfully challenges,  here are just a few of the things we might seek to accomplish in our work together:

 

 

Cultivating increased safety for partners to identify and assert their needs in a healthy way

 

Identifying patterns of conflict and the true needs being expressed beneath them

 

Compassionately identifying each partner's chief defense mechanisms  or Internal Protectors that block intimacy

 

Improving the mutual regulation of emotions.

Helping clients identify when their own emotion regulation is disrupted and how this impacts the couple's dynamic (each partner asking themselves:  'What is my part in the co-creation of this?')

 

Increasing empathic attunement 

 

Decreasing power struggles (closeness over rightness!)

 

Identifying the unconscious projections of past / childhood hurts at work to mindfully use them as tools for repair

 

Challenging unhealthy reenactments of past traumas

 

Identifying negative, ineffective communication patterns or 'Demon Dances'

 

Disrupting Ping Pong styles of communication wherein we're simply reacting defensively to our partner vs. truly listening and pausing to respond thoughtfully

 

Developing tools for improved communication and swifter conflict resolution 

 

Increasing each partner's accountability and ownership of their feelings / actions / experiences

 

Increasing each partner's capacity around nurturing - of giving and receiving with increased ease

 

Addressing areas of fusion or codependent styles of relating

 

Processing and healing old traumas that may have caused distance or alienation

 

Increasing the overall quality of authentic intimacy 

 

Increasing overall mindfulness vs. reactivity

 

Learning how to avoid the many pitfalls of the Ego that rob couples of fulfilling contact such as: ​ blaming, judging, agendas, controlling impulses, punishing behavior, the need to be right, withholding behavior, grudges, illusions... Collaboratively reworking your Vision for your partnership together   

 

 

 

 

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